my best friend, my baby, my life.

busy friends and unreliable boyfriends. you were always there for me through whatever.
I don't like coming home now.
No one to welcome me home.
No one ecstatic to see me when I open the door.
It feels even weirder to come home to an empty room now.
You're pillow on the floor. cold and untouched.
Up to bedtime till morning, I'm still struggling with your absence.
No one sleeps beside me now or wakes me up to go to school.

you were about 6 months old. with thiller.

I remembered that I preffered Thiller over you because you were so hyperactive and tensed.
But eventually, I somehow grew to love you more.

you fell asleep on my clothes while watching me pack my bags.

You always hated to see me go overseas.
You memorized the fact that when I pack my bags, it means that I'll disappear for several days and sometimes weeks. You have no idea how much I missed you and wished that you were there with me. But I knew you missed me too when I came home and you would stand on two legs ans started dancing and jumping.

when I got my first pair of specs.

you were so human that you even put ur head on pillows to sleep.

I'm still coping not having you around. and the hallucinations aren't helping where I hear the grunts you make when you're tired and your footsteps when your claws hit the tiled floor. I keep imagining that you would jump on my bed when I'm about to sleep. I visit your grave everytime before I go home from where ever.
I miss you so much. 8 years is a long time to move on from.
I hope that you are really in a better place. I love you.