so i've heard.

sweet slip

Although I'm content with what I have in life now, it doesn't mean that I don't get depressed.  My mistake was reading SixBillionSecrets about suicide and depression where it started to stir my mind with my past. During my hiatus, I attempted suicide and I hate myself for not going through with it. I've never accomplished anything in my life and instead of feeling lucky of escaping such a fate, I feel pathetic. I knew then that when the news spread, I would come back home a loser for being so gutless. So I ran away.
I still wonder what it would have been like if I really did die. one thing's for sure, I would stop hurting people.

Here's my secret,  I envy those who went through with suicide and succeeded. I get upset when people call them 'stupid'. They could've helped them before it happened but they didn't.They have no idea what's it like to reach that limit, to willingly throw everything away.