guilt and self hatred

when something happens, i cant help but feel...
all the blame if it has anything that involves me

thoughts like,

"if i wasn't there"

or

"if i hadn't had done that"

would pop up..

-

who do you trust or tell when you're in trouble??

1. you're friends who you've known since forever
2. or the person in the same siuation??

how do you handle

10 to 100 different opinons??

-

how do you know which one to choose??

-

and plainly,

how do you recover from it??